Memes, Transfers, And Strippers

Whattup Blackflames,
Super crazy week and also awesome and also kinda sad but mostly sick week!

WE LIVED
Portuguese dnd is still going strong and we did not die! 3/4 of us went unconscious but in the end the kraken was defeated. Now we just have to deal with the pirates. We also got to experience my second favorite thing with roleplaying games: extemporaneous arguments with the DM about minute details of how reality functions, such as:

Does a kraken float like a fish after it dies?
Can a ship be repaired using kraken carapace?
Can a ship carry a kraken corpse behind it?
Can somebody teleport while holding a barrel of gunpowder?
Will a lit fuse stay lit through the process of being teleported to an enemy ship?

Food for thought.

The Aurelius Method
So tuesday we had companionship inventory and I was like "elder what can I do to help you better" and he was like "nothing" and so I was like "Great. We are now implementing the Aurelius method then."
What is the Aurelius method you ask? Well in Cradle, Eithan Aurelius is at one point questioned on his 'intense' training methods. Basically, he just throws his students into the fire, lets them nearly die, and then they get super strong. Cassias, Eithan's brother, at one point said that "I personally rescued a girl who ran from his training into a place called the Thousand Beast Forest. She survived by hiding from two-headed bears. I found her crouched in a cave, dirty and bleeding, but she begged me to leave her rather than take her back to train." Everybody is concerned but Eithan assures them: "Don't worry, I don't train my students like that anymore. I was far too lenient before. After weeks of my training, that girl should have been fighting those bears. With her fists." Or, as Yerrin puts it, "If you don't feel like you're going to die when you're training, then you're doing it wrong."
I took that to heart.
So Tuesday was freaking awesome. It turns out, people know how to do a lot more than they think they do. So, when you give a noobie all the contacts, navigating the area, planning, and then offer to help him... he basically does it perfectly fine. We also had some great lessons: one lesson this dude had a parrot and for some reason I asked "well does the parrot bite" and he was like "no of course not" and for some reason in my brain that meant the same thing as "its a good idea to stick your finger through the cage and touch the parrot". So I stuck my finger through and then he ripped like half my finger off. Also, we walked home in the rain without getting wet, so that was pretty sick.
And then the whole rest of the week was just peaceful training and hard working, and everybody lived happily ever after.

Happily Ever After
PSYCH president called me at 10:50 and was like "Elder tommorow theres gonna be an emergency transfer and you also have to stay up all night ok thanks" and I was like ??? but yeah I stayed up literally all night studying and listening to music and then in the morning we packed up my comps stuff and took an uber to the mission home. So that was kind of sad that my comp had decided to go home but also at the same time... I got to eat PB&Js in president's house and I also got to sleep in his house for like 2 hours so that was kind of dope. Then we went to the mission office and hung out until my comp took an uber to the airport. So yeah.

Just for the record my comp didn't go home because I Aurelius'd him haha, he actually said that was one of the best days of his mission. So next time I train anybody its blackflame trials 100%

After my comp went home they kept me in the office doing slave work (putting the little stickers in the book of mormons) until I was like "actually I have not eaten anything since this morning" and Elder Herman (meu amor) was like "oh chilling lemme grab the MISSION CREDIT CARD real quick and then we'll hit Popeyes". So I ate popeyes for the first time in Brazil! rating: solid 8/10. Not sure why anybody thought it was better than Chick-fil-a though.

At night I got to do a division with the financial secretaries and WOW it was so much fun. Elder Mogurd is Elder Medeiros's other son, and he's training to be the new financial sec and he is an INSANE missionary. We had this crazy spiritual lesson where we were teaching this dude about the restoration and I taught about the apostasy, so I gave this whole example of a glass tablet that was supported by three pillar representing the church (the prophet, apostles, and priesthood) and then when people killed the prophets and apostles the church fell and shattered into a bunch of pieces which people picked up and starting making their own churches- apostasy. So then I passed it off to Elder Mogurd to talk about the restoration and he just... stopped. And thought. And then he was like "Irmao... what have you understood so far about this gospel of Jesus Christ?" And then the dude we were teaching was like "Well, the gospel got broken up and lost some parts of it, and I believe that God will restore it one day" and we all FREAKED OUT and were like Boy have we got news for you. So we talked about Joseph Smith and he was like "I believe in everything you taught, I have been praying for God to send somebody to teach me and you are the answer to my prayers" and we were like CARAAAAAMABA 

So that was sick. We also went to visit the bishop of the ward that night and Elder Boone who knows the area stopped us on the way and said "Elders you know how the scriptures say that there is opposition in all the things?" and we were like "yeah" and he was like "so there's two strip clubs on the way to the bishops house, keep your heads down" and so we awkwardly walked the clouds of smoke and strobe lights with our heads down it was kind of funny. We ended off the night making pasta in the office elders house and had a very interesting time going to bed involving a call from the APs, foot massages, and a blue Christmas light rave. All in all, kind of the best day of my mission. 

I was alone how spooky
The next day I got to take an Uber by myself back to my house :| then I hung out in our house for like an hour chilling to music and also sleeping I was still tired haha. Eventually my new comp Elder Mendo arrived. He's awesome. Elder Medeiros was also there to travel with Elder Mendo and the moment got in our house he started investigating to figure out what happened with my comp like it was a crime scene haha. He also killed a bunch of ants just because he could. At night, he Maria came and gave us all the stuff she bought for us, which was pretty cool. 

lo fi day
Friday we had a lo-fi cooking session to make pasta. I also taught Elder Mendo how to play Megalovania on the piano. We visited a member and she made this homemade bread with honey and butter and wow it was great. Later in the day we had this lesson with a teenager and his parents who are reactivated members. We were talking about his experiences with women in the past and then his mom said "oh but it's worse with boys right?" And we were like, and he was like "MOM WHAT THE Heck she's joking guys" and we clarified that we were not homophonic and also she was actually just trolling us. This madwoman then spent the whole rest of the lesson joking that her son was gay it was hilarious. 

English Class
Saturday we had English class and a bunch of people actually showed up!  I stole this game we always played in my French class called "Capitão"  but I made it "Capitão Moroni" so we spent the whole time passing around the title of liberty and learning how to pray in English. We also had some lessons with some kids and we literally just watched videos with them haha it was great. 

Day of memes
Sunday a member in our word kept sending us these memes that are going around in brasil of fake LDS Pixar movie covers it's hilarious. Also we had an awesome lesson and marked our friend Ana Luisa to be baptized! It was kind of funny because she's pretty quiet and also has a speech disorder, so even though I try and include her as much as possible in our conversations I wasn't sure exactly what she was thinking about the church and baptism and such so I was taking a super subtle approach to the invite and then she was like "are you asking me if I want to be baptized because I accept" and then I was like "oh great."

And basically that was it for this week! Pretty crazy and also awesome! Hope you all have a fantastic week!

God is Good,
Elder Ebbert

























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